Where do they come from?

Growing up in a small all white farming community, my eyes were blinded to many things. I really thought that being racist meant not allowing black folk to sit at the front of the bus. I knew shipping everyone with Japanese decent to a "camp" was wrong, but that stuff doesn't happen any more. I thought that as long as you know that everyone is the same you are doing your part in the battle of race. Man, have I learned how wrong that is.

I now have been exposed to folks from all over the world, people from different ethnicities, varying religions, cultures and backgrounds. And above all I have learned that we are not the same and to say that we are actually is as ego centric as saying that as a white person I have more right to a seat on the bus than someone who is brown.

So I struggle often knowing how to help my children and my community embrace differences in a more educated way. I really think the fight is with ignorance.

An Asian American university student attended church with us recently and was greeted by several kind and loving people in our congregation. The number one question they asked, "Where are you from?" For someone who grew up in mid-Michigan the question was completely offensive. Rather than a greeting of welcome, the message was clear to this student. "You don't look like us, so you must be from 'somewhere else'". Rather than greeting her they actually were saying you don't belong.

I haven't decided what my part is. Can I really change any of this? What I can think of right now is passing on what I learn. There is a great article in PARENTING magazine that talks about the struggles of a mom of a bi-racial daughter. Read it. Talk about it. Live with it and see how you and your family can help.

The article can be found here.

One more thought....
Last year Sam and I were picking up a family from Africa to take to our weekly playgroup. We don't have many African students involved with our group so Sam was a bit surprised. "Why is his skin so dark?" Sam asked me as we helped him into the car seat. I started to explain that people from around the world all look different and people here look different depending on what their parents look like. "For example you don't look like you friend Tom who is from China." Sam's reply..."I don't?"

That is the type of ignorance that bring joy to my heart. I hope that my children grow up not thinking that we are all alike, but thinking that all people are equal.

new and improved blog

just wanted to announce that we're working on a new and improved blog.

we like this site but we really would like to post much more. we want a place to blog, post photo albums, and give additional information about us. we also want to add password protection - just that little bit of extra security. so we're upgrading in the near future.

so when eveything is up and running, we'll announce the new site here.

if you have suggestions for cool additions to the new site, let us know in the comments. we'd love to know what you'd like to see.

A big lesson

We had a big scare with Ruthie Roo this past week at my mom's house. I was helping Sam clean the wax out of his ears (too much info? hmmm....)in the bathroom when Ruthie walked in. I noticed that she was headed for the cleaning supplies that had been left on the counter and I firmly told her not to touch. In the space of oh about .5 seconds she had decided to disobey and give the bottle a good squirt. The problem - the bottle was facing her. The next moments, which felt like hours, were filled with her screams and my panic over the Clorox in my 2 year old daughters eyes. Mom and I held her over the sink and rinsed her eyes out with luke warm water and listened to her screams. We gave her (and ourselves to be honest) a break about 10 minutes into it. I held her in a towel and cried with her...hoping no permanent damage had been done. We went back to the sink for round two and she started to scream again. But this time she was screaming a different tune. At the top of her lungs she screamed, "this is why you don't disobey! You get your eyes washed out." If the whole thing hadn't been so intense I know that I would have burst out into laughter. Hopefully it will be a lesson for both of us.

It really is moments like those that I learn about myself from my kids. I wonder how often HE looks down on me and wonders why I don't obey the first time. I can almost hear HIM..."don't touch. You will burn your eyes. The consequences aren't worth it." Yet I forge on and do what I want to do anyway. Then I scream over the pain that it caused me.

I have been tempted in the past week to disobey HIM in regards to our big move to China. Sometimes it just feels too hard. Like when we have strangers walking through our house and I remember everything that I love about our home and I don't want to give it up. Or when I am going through trunks of baby clothes I have been saving. I know that I don't need to store all of this stuff. It is just stuff, but it is sad none the less.

I even find myself pitching a fit in moments when I am trying to be obedient. I was reading a book about helping kids transition into other cultures and I literally freaked. "My kids won't be normal. What if moving to China emotional scars them for the rest of their lives." I cried...hard...screamed actually and then remembered the screams of my sweet little girl. At times disobeying seems easier, more fun, or better, but deep down I know that it isn't.

It is hard to obey...almost impossible at times. But worth the effort in the long run.

"What is impossible for man, is possible with HIM"

The House

Thank you so much for all of you who have been asking HIM to sell our house. We had a family go through it on Saturday and they have verbally told us that they want to buy it. They were not pre-approved for a loan so we asked that they get the financing and then call us with an offer. If you will continue to pr@y - if this is HIS answer that they will get their financing pulled together. We will keep you posted. This really would be a miracle. It seemed like they had already decided they wanted to buy it before they even walked through it. We didn't believe it at first, but then we realized that we should have more faith. It is what we have been asking for!

Sunday Morning

Easter Celebration

As Ruthie and I shopped for the food for today she was singing "he died, now he is alive." It was a great way to start a weekend of rejoicing. We enjoyed celebrating with several international and American friends. The photos tell the story of our day better than I could. We hope your day was as blessed as ours.

would you like a bacon candle?

today we were getting our house ready to show. we've been told that little things like the smell of baking cookies can leave people with a good impression of your house. so, tammy and i were batting around ideas for "aromatherapy" for the house. we thought that a candle would be great for this. soon after, tammy and sam went to a nearby store to purchase one - preferably one that smells like cookies. :-)

while at the store, sam came up with the perfect scent for the candle - bacon. he kept trying to persuade tammy that what we needed was a candle that smelled like frying bacon. that would make people like the house. and even more, he told her that people walking down the street would smell the candle and want to come inside to look at the house. he told her that a bacon candle was the sure way to sell our house.

so...would you buy a house that smelled like bacon?

i give my son a 10 for creativity...and a 9.5 for a persuasive argument. BUT tammy bought a candle. she went with a sugar cookie scent.

the bacon candle will have to wait for another day. :-)

SuperSam

Sam's new love is superheros. I am not sure where it came from. He had never watched Superman, the Hero Friends, or Spiderman. I didn't even know that the Green Lantern wasn't something that you take camping. To be honest growing up with all sisters - this is all new to me. In fact I was sure that it should be stopped. Quickly. I mean, what good can come from Sam CONSTANTLY, talking about bad guys and which good guy had the right super power to take care of the dilemma. Bryan (being the expert guy of the household) assures me that this is all normal. I guess boys need to run around in capes to some day grow up to be good men. I was skeptical. Until..

He started to sing a song about JC being more powerful than superheros. He then explained to me that the boys at school were arguing about which superhero had the best power. "I told them that HE is the best superhero. Right Mom?" In that moment I knew that our little superhero would be fine. He has it all in perspective.

So superheros have become part of our everyday life, but we have put a limit on how many superhero questions are allowed at dinner! You would too.

head to head challenge

I have heard so many stories about how stubborn I was as a child. I would pull all of the Kleenex out of the box. Mom would spank me, fold them and return them. My reaction...to pull them all out again, but rip them in two.

As I look into Ruthie's eyes, I see myself at two. She sets her jaw, gets a look in her eye and digs in to get what she wants. Because I was a stubborn two year old who grew up to be a stubborn mother, we often go head to head.

My mom often admits that she pr@yed for me to have a stubborn child so that I would know what I put her through. (Bryan complains that he is an innocent bystander in all of this stubbornness. Hmmm, I really wonder what his mom would say to that.)

So it is mornings like this morning, when I am sure that I dealt with four fits and a tantrum (yes in my book they are different) before 9 that I wonder if I am going to make it until Ruth turns 3. (May 14th for those of you who don't know!) But then it is afternoons like this one - dancing with my princess in the backyard that I know I would have her no other way. She is so full of life, so determined, and I know that once all of her passion is focused she will do AMAZING things.

Until then I plea for HIM to help Bryan and I focus all that wonderful passion HE gave her. (Oh, and I also send her to my mom's house for a few days. I figure she should enjoy all the fruit of her prayers as well!)